Scottie-GNZ Posted May 23, 2002 Share Posted May 23, 2002 Here's Your Sign..... Stupid people should have to wear signs that just say, "I'm Stupid" That way you wouldn't rely on them, would you? You wouldn't ask them anything. It would be like, "Excuse me... oops never mind..... didn't see your sign." It's like before my wife and I moved. Our house was full of boxes and there was a U-Haul truck in our driveway. My neighbor comes over and says "Hey,you moving?" "Nope. We just pack our stuff up once or twice a week to see how many boxes it takes. Here's your sign." A couple of months ago I went fishing with a buddy of mine, we pulled his boat into the dock, I lifted up this big 'ol stringer of bass and this idiot on the dock goes, "Hey, y'all catch all them fish?" "Nope. Talked 'em into giving up. Here's your sign." I was watching one of those animal shows on the Discovery Channel. There was a guy inventing a shark bite suit. And there's only one way to test it. "Alright Jimmy, you got that shark suit on...it looks good... They want you to jump into this pool of sharks, and you tell us if it hurts when they bite you." "Well, all right, but hold my sign. I don't wanna lose it. Last time I had a flat tire, I pulled my truck into one of those side-of-the-road gas stations. The attendant walks out, looks at my truck, looks at me, and I SWEAR he said, "Tire go flat?" I couldn't resist. I said, "Nope. I was driving around and those other three just swelled right up on me. Here's your sign." We were trying to sell our car about a year ago. A guy came over to the house and drove the car around for about 45 minutes. We get back to the house, he gets out of the car, reaches down and grabs the exhaust pipe, then says, "Darn that's hot!" See? If he'd been wearing his sign, I could have stopped him. I learned to drive an 18-wheeler in my days of adventure. Wouldn't you know I misjudged the height of a bridge. The truck got stuck and I couldn't get it out no matter how I tried. I radioed in for help and eventually a local cop shows up to take the report. He went through his basic questioning..ok..no problem. I thought for sure he was clear of needing a sign...until he asked... "So..is your truck stuck?" I couldn't help myself ! I looked at him, looked back at the rig and then back to him and said "no I'm delivering a bridge...Here's your sign." I stayed late at work one night and a co-worker looked at me and said "Are you still here?" I replied, "No. I left about 10 minutes ago. Here's your sign." Anybody you know need a sign today? See below and lets also give that one a caption. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Thurem Posted May 23, 2002 Share Posted May 23, 2002 Is this cruel and unusual punishment? No, these cars where built for hauling stuff, here's your sign. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ZR8ED Posted May 23, 2002 Share Posted May 23, 2002 Maybe the dude just wanted to lower the car and could not afford the lowering springs.. Just compress the heck out of them till they stay compressed..hehehe cheap eh? Ne needs a sign badly.. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Aaron Posted May 23, 2002 Share Posted May 23, 2002 "Wait till you see the sub box I am building out of this stuff." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Anonymous Posted May 23, 2002 Share Posted May 23, 2002 I need help obtaining my sign. Could you locate one for me but please don't mispell any words on the sign because I refuse to wear a sign that is mispeeled and send operating directions! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Datsun660z Posted May 25, 2002 Share Posted May 25, 2002 I thought My jetta was slow untill I saw this, that one has to be slower than mine? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Anonymous Posted May 25, 2002 Share Posted May 25, 2002 How about: "Dyslextic Stuntman Fails in Attempt to get Ramp to Jump Car."? My favorite personal "here's your sign" story happened in 1981, when I installed a turbocharged Buick V6 in my 1974 Vega. (For those that don't know, this could be done with Buick factory parts.) Anyway, I drove it to a local Chevy/Buick/Olds dealership to see about some other parts and the counter man asked what kind of motor. "Buick V6", I replied. "Can't be", he replied, "They don't fit. You mean a Regal." "No", I answered. "it's a Vega." He actually got upset with me and made a comment about not being able to help me if I didn't know what kind of car I had. I offered to show him the car. Well, him and I (and a few others) went out to look at my car. I didn't have a hood on it yet so I just pointed at the motor; I even started it to show him it wasn't some kind of trick. He never said a word, just walked around and looked the car completely over. Finally, he walked over to me, very red-faced, tapped me in the chest and said (honest to god): "I don't know what kind of joke you are playing, but (pointing at the engine) THAT motor will NOT fit (pointing at the car) in THAT car." and stormed off. I got in the car and left; leaving an excessive amount of tire smoke in the lot. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CruxGNZ Posted May 27, 2002 Share Posted May 27, 2002 Hey Scottie, you know they whole story behind that car with all the crap on it? I saw that posted in a tire store about a year ago. Apparently, drugs were involved . The list of crap that was in the car was AMAZING! There was like 10 bags of concrete in the trunk. If memory serves me right (it never does) this was in a Home Depot parking lot. There was a man and woman that were going out to the woods to build a cabin! They didn't get very far, you can't see in the picture, but both rear tires blew out from the wieght of all that crap. I wish I could tell the whole story behind the picture, funny stuff. !M! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BLKMGK Posted May 27, 2002 Share Posted May 27, 2002 That occured in Maryland not all that far from me. I recall seeing the pic in the newspaper - it was indeed damned funny! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Drewz Posted May 28, 2002 Share Posted May 28, 2002 Thats a sweet lauch dood!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! lmao Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Anonymous Posted May 28, 2002 Share Posted May 28, 2002 It amazes me how much people will try to put on a car or truck. I used to work for a big lumber yard (One of Roseburgs shops for those in the NorthWest)and I couldn't believe what people would try to put on a mini pickup for example. A whole unit of plywood (like above), this stuff is heavy dude, not just a little either (to give you an idea, a typical forklift would easily pick its backwheels up with two units on it if you weren't careful, riding a wheelie down the dock ramp was interesting to say the least). I saw one truck actually (I kid you not) wheelie out of the warehouse and he just slowed up got the front wheels down and continued on his way. Or the lets haul a matress with a car, ok, everyone put your hand up and grab the matress... Silly I tell ya... Regards, Lone Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tdab Posted May 29, 2002 Share Posted May 29, 2002 Captions: "Honey, I told you I needed to build the garage before you park under it" "VW introduces its new wood panel wagon. Drivers Wanted." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pop N Wood Posted May 29, 2002 Share Posted May 29, 2002 The picture of the car went around the internet about a year or two ago. Here is the caption i got with the pic: Home Depot / True story .... This picture was taken in Waldorf, MD by a Transportation Supervisor for a company that delivers building materials for 84 Lumber. When he saw it there in the parking lot of IHOP, he went and bought a camera to take pictures. The car is still running as can be witnessed by the exhaust. A woman is either asleep or otherwise out in the front seat passenger side. The guy driving it was over jogging up and down on Rt. 925 in the background. The witnesses said their physical state was OTHER than normal and the police just shook their heads in amazement. The driver finally came back after the police were there and was getting down at the back to cut the 'twine around the load. They told him to get back until it was taken off. The materials were loaded at Home Depot. Their store manager said they had the customer sign a waiver! Both back tires are trashed. The back shocks were driven up through the floorboard. In the back seat are 10 bags, 80 lbs. each of concrete. On the roof are many 2X4s, 4X4s and OSB sheets of lumber. They estimated the load weight at 3000 lbs. The car is a VW Jetta with FL plates and the guy said he was headed for Annapolis. JUST UNBELIEVABLE!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.