CruxGNZ Posted November 20, 2004 Share Posted November 20, 2004 This was posted on another board, and thought it was pretty funny. Apparently, this is an urban legend according to Snopes Click Here, but it's still good for a laugh. The following is supposedly an actual question given on a University of Washington chemistry mid-term. The answer by one student was so "profound" that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well. Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)? Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant. One student, however, wrote the following: First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different Religions that exist in the world today. Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added. This gives two possibilities: 1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose. 2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over. So which is it? If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year that, "it will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you, and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number 2 must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over. The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore, extinct...leaving only Heaven thereby proving the existence of a divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting "Oh my God." THIS STUDENT RECEIVED THE ONLY "A" !M! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Z-Gad Posted November 20, 2004 Share Posted November 20, 2004 ROFL!! Definately worth the read!! Thanks! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
VRJoe Posted November 21, 2004 Share Posted November 21, 2004 ROTFL, That kid has a future, Not sure where though. - Joe Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
z-REX Posted November 21, 2004 Share Posted November 21, 2004 ROTFL' date=' That kid has a future, Not sure where though. - Joe[/quote'] i'm thinking either politics, or anything outside the catholic church. with his theory that there's no more threat of hell, collection plates might get a little thin!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BrandonsZ Posted November 22, 2004 Share Posted November 22, 2004 Did he mention that Teresa is a 40-year-old divorced neighbor of his parents? And that it would probably be his first and last sexual experiance? Someone who has the time to write that much instead of just leaving after the test is obsessing way too much on his experiance. But that guy is dang funny. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zemus Posted November 22, 2004 Share Posted November 22, 2004 ahhaahh GENIUS! All that needs to be said Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Trevor Posted November 23, 2004 Share Posted November 23, 2004 Teresa kept shouting "Oh my God." Mrs. Kerry are you trying to seduce me? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
z-REX Posted November 23, 2004 Share Posted November 23, 2004 Teresa kept shouting "Oh my God." Mrs. Kerry are you trying to seduce me? thanks. i may well never get an erection again. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mikelly Posted November 23, 2004 Share Posted November 23, 2004 Find that kid and I'll hire him TOMORROW. Best thing I've read on the net in a while... Sad Really... Mike Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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