Guest greimann Posted June 4, 2003 Share Posted June 4, 2003 I don't know what set him off. Maybe it was the sweet and sour smell of a slightly rich mixture of 91 octane and a hot catalyst. Maybe it was the V8 badge on the decklid. Maybe it was the one digit salute as I passed him on the right, but I could certainly tell from the blender-full-of-marbles clatter that resonated from under the hood - it was ON! The next light brought us side by side. Ahead was a half a mile of clear asphalt. I look to my left to eyeball my next victim, but all I could see was the badge on the door, "Duramax Diesel - HD 2500". My friend Mike, riding shotgun, wondered out loud, "Is 2500 the load capacity or the cost to fill the tank?" Good one Mike, hee hee. Green light and we go. The Duramax moves that three and a half-ton beast off the line pretty sprightly, but I only need 1/2 throttle to stay even. I like to sand bag the first 50 yards or so just so they can tell their friends, "I had 'em off the line!" I reach the top of first gear and Mr. Diesel is still in it. "Is that all you got?" I shout, but like so many garbage trucks from hell, the death clatter is impossible to shout over. " Cripes this thing is long," I think. I can see the front bumper from the windshield and have to look in the rear view to see the tail pipe. I snick it gently into second gear. Don't want to waste one gram of fine Yokohama rubber on this turkey. Again 1/2 throttle is all that is required to keep pace, and that is with a passenger and two bags of dog food in the hatch. The diesel is really redlining his mill - 3000-rpm! Oooh I'm trembling in my sandals now. Oddly enough, there is no smoke from his 4" tail pipe. I wonder if he is running race diesel? "Had enough?" I shout, but verbal communication is as futile as battling the Borg. "Ok Mike, I've had enough and the dogs are getting hungry". Warp 8 Mr. Sulu! Aye, Aye Captain! Just as the tach crosses 3500 RPM, the melodious harmonics of the "sweet spot" echo off the block walls lining the street, as 350 cubic inches of "The Heartbeat of America" are brought to WFO. Second to third brought that classic squat of the Datsun rear end. It is if it was saying, "Kiss it". 1/2 way through 3rd and Mr. Duramax was looking for a pile of manure to haul. Much more fitting a task I must say. We stop at the next light for a right turn home and do a Chinese fire drill as Mr. Dungmax passes by. And that, my fellow enthusiasts, is the unabashed fun you too can have if you GET BUSY and finish those projects! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tim240z Posted June 4, 2003 Share Posted June 4, 2003 Oddly enough, there is no smoke from his 4" tail pipe. I wonder if he is running race diesel? ROTFLMAO!!!!!!!! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ... Love it Dave!! maybe he should pick on someone his own speed.....maybe a Honda or something!! Tim Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dan Juday Posted June 4, 2003 Share Posted June 4, 2003 Dude you are BORED! Racing a diesel dung truck. You'd think in H.B. there would be something more worthy to challenge you. Great story. Hope the pups didn't go hungry. as 350 cubic inches of "The Heartbeat of America" are brought to WFO. WFO? Wide full open? Whitey, fxxx off? Wild fabrication overload? I just can't keep up with the acronyms. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jay1970Z Posted June 4, 2003 Share Posted June 4, 2003 Excellent use of descriptive imagery. You get an A on your paper lol. 1/2 way through 3rd and Mr. Duramax was looking for a pile of manure to haul. Much more fitting a task I must say. We stop at the next light for a right turn home and do a Chinese fire drill as Mr. Dungmax passes by. Dungmax...lol Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David K Posted June 4, 2003 Share Posted June 4, 2003 Dude you are BORED! Racing a diesel dung truck.You'd think in H.B. there would be something more worthy to challenge you. What, a Honda or a lifted ford ranger? Lol Dave, Chinese fire drill...... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phantom Posted June 4, 2003 Share Posted June 4, 2003 Dave, These guys think they've got it all now as some of these new diesels have like 350 HP and 500 lb-ft of torque. What they forget is that their vehicle weighs like 5,000 lbs and they have a power band about 1,500 rpm wide. I'm still looking for that Cobra driver that looked down his nose at me last week. I'm going to bury it in bowtie fumes and see what's on his face then - like a double case of chagrin! I love that quote off "The Waterboy": "Lets open up a can of Whoopass!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest greimann Posted June 4, 2003 Share Posted June 4, 2003 WFO? Wide full open? Whitey' date=' fxxx off? Wild fabrication overload? I just can't keep up with the acronyms. [/quote'] WFO is Wide F..king Open. Maybe that vernacular is unique to my neck of the woods? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lockjaw Posted June 4, 2003 Share Posted June 4, 2003 Watch out for a powerstroke, thats all I got to say. They can be modded to rock your world. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DavyZ Posted June 4, 2003 Share Posted June 4, 2003 The only thing cooler is if the dog was riding shotgun in your car lol That was a truly entertaining story---thank you!! Davy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PETEW Posted June 4, 2003 Share Posted June 4, 2003 That is some funny stuff. Like one of the other guys said there are some deisel monsters out there. My friends ram dynoed 380hp (I know big deal) but it dynoed close to 1000 ft/lb torque. He has an M3 ('98 model) and the truck will pull it. It is amazing when he jumps on it. The smoke screen it blows is pretty hilarious, too. Enjoy that beatiful car and keep the entertaining stories coming. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest zfan Posted June 4, 2003 Share Posted June 4, 2003 Laughed my ass off. Go get em. Mike Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Heavy Z Posted June 4, 2003 Share Posted June 4, 2003 HAHAHAHA!!! So much of a story is in how it's told, as others have mentioned about the quality of your post. Nice way to give him a false sense of being a close race, and then giving him a healthy dose of 'shock and awe,' hybrid Z style. I'll bet he had some of the 'ol "but the dealer said..." resentment pop into his head fo a second or two after you pulled away from him. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
80LS1T Posted June 5, 2003 Share Posted June 5, 2003 And that, my fellow enthusiasts, is the unabashed fun you too can have if you GET BUSY and finish those projects! There you go again getting me all excited to drive my car! LOL I've got my eye on a Camaro(LT1) that needs a lesson! It's getting close to driveable!(see story in non-tech section) Guy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phantom Posted June 5, 2003 Share Posted June 5, 2003 Guy, You better get going. It's June already and it will probably be starting to snow up there in a few more weeks. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
80LS1T Posted June 6, 2003 Share Posted June 6, 2003 Yeah tell me about it! LOL SNOW + SALT =RUST I went to the exhaust shop that I wanted to do my exhaust but... I told him that I had a 1980 Datsun 280ZX with a SBC 350 in it. So then he asked me if the car originally had Cats? I said yeah but Im not putting them on with the new engine. So he tells me that from the cats forward has to be original! I said what do you mean original? He said "well did it have one pipe with the six cylinder in it?" I said "yeah?" He said "well even though you have a different engine in there you still have to have it like it was a six cylinder." I said "you mean one pipe?" then he said " yeah" and I was like "um thats kind of impossible with two exhaust manifolds? " So then I asked him who could do it for me then and he told me of two places that might do it. The one place I went to looked like a dump though! I dont know if I really want someone who cant even keep a clean shop, working on my car!! I really wanted the first guy to do my exhaust!!!! Damn emissions!!! So now I need to find someone who I trust to do it. Oh well it just another small road block. Guy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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