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Who is The Stig?


S30TRBO

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He has never lost a sock.

 

He has been known to cure narcolepsy, just by walking into the room.

 

His organ donation card, also lists his beard.

 

He’s a lover, not a fighter, but he’s also a fighter, so don’t get any ideas.

 

When it is raining, it is because he is sad.

 

Even his parents’ advice is insightful.

 

If there were an interesting gland, his would be larger than most men’s entire lower intestines.

 

His shirts never wrinkle.

 

He is left-handed. And right-handed.

 

Even if he forgets to put postage on his mail, it gets there.

 

He once knew a call was a wrong number, even though the person on the other end wouldn’t admit it.

 

You can see his charisma from space.

 

The police often question him, just because they find him interesting.

 

He once punched a magician. That’s right. You heard me.

 

When he orders a salad, he gets the dressing right there on top of the salad, where it belongs…where there is no turning back.

 

If a monument was built in his honor, Mt. Rushmore would close, due to poor attendance.

 

His beard alone has experienced more than a lesser man’s entire body.

 

His blood smells like cologne.

 

On every continent in the world, there is a sandwich named after him.

 

He doesn’t believe in using oven mitts, nor potholders.

 

His cereal never gets soggy. It sits there, staying crispy, just for him.

 

His pillow talk is years ahead of it’s time.

 

Respected archaeologists fight over his discarded apple cores.

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