auxilary Posted May 27, 2004 Share Posted May 27, 2004 1. Assmosis - The process by which some people seem to absorb success and advancement by kissing up to the boss. 2. Blamestorming - Sitting around in a group discussing why a deadline was missed or a project failed and who was responsible. 3. Seagull Manager - A manager, who flies in, makes a lot of noise, craps over everything, and then leaves. 4. Salmon Day - The experience of spending an entire day swimming upstream only to get screwed and die in the end. 5. Irritainment - Entertainment and media spectacles that are annoying but you find yourself unable to stop watching them. The O.J. trials were a prime example. 6. Chainsaw Consultant - An outside expert brought in to reduce the employee head count, leaving the brass with clean hands. 7. G.O.O.D. Job - A "Get-Out-Of-Debt" job. A well-paying job people take in order to pay off their debts, one that they will quit as soon as they are solvent again. 8. Adminisphere - The rarefied organizational layers beginning just above the rank and file. Decisions that fall from the adminisphere are often profoundly inappropriate or irrelevant to the problems they were designed to solve. 9. Flight Risk - Used to describe employees who are suspected of planning to leave the company or department soon. 10. Career Limiting Move (CLM) - Used among microserfs to describe an ill-advised activity. Trashing your boss while he or she is within earshot is a serious CLM. 11. Generica - Features of the American landscape that are exactly the same no matter where one is, such as fast food joints, strip malls, subdivisions. Used as in: "We were so lost in Generica that I forgot what city we were in." 12. Ohno-Second - That minuscule fraction of time in which you realize that you've just made a BIG mistake. 13. Umfriend - A sexual relation of dubious standing or a concealed intimate relationship, as in "This is Dylan, my...um...friend." 14. Body Nazis - Hard-core exercise and weightlifting fanatics who look down on anyone who doesn't work out obsessively. 15. Cube Farm - An office filled with cubicles. 16. Idea Hamsters - People who always seem to have their idea generators running. 17. Mouse Potato - The on-line, wired generation's answer to the couch potato. 18. Prairie Dogging - When someone yells or drops something loudly in a cube farm, and people's heads pop up over the walls to see what's going on. 19. SITCOMs - What yuppies turn into when they have children and one of them stops working to stay home with the kids. Stands for "Single Income, Two Children, and Oppressive Mortgage". 20. Starter Marriage - A short-lived first marriage that ends in divorce with no kids, no property and no regrets. 21. Stress Puppy - A person who seems to thrive on being stressed out and whiny. 22. Swiped Out - An ATM or credit card that has been rendered useless because the magnetic strip is worn away from extensive use. 23. 404 - Someone who is clueless. From the World Wide Web error message "404-URL Not Found," meaning that the requested web page could not be located. Used as in: "Don't bother asking him... he's 404, man." 24. Percussive Maintenance - The fine art of whacking the crap out of an electronic device to get it to work again. 25. Alpha Geek - The most knowledgeable, technically proficient person in an office or work group. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dave240Z Posted May 27, 2004 Share Posted May 27, 2004 Nice. Thanks Aux. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest ON3GO Posted May 27, 2004 Share Posted May 27, 2004 if i ever hear somebody use that "404" saying.. i WILL beat him up... Bar none! Mike Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
auxilary Posted May 28, 2004 Author Share Posted May 28, 2004 Mike, you haven't been to any corporate meetings. When upper managements says things like "let's throw it up against the wall" or "I'll ping you after the meeting" I'm a network engineer. There's nothing worse than hearing someone say "PING" to refer to getting in touch with someone In a while, I suppose people will say "I'll ACK/SYN you later" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest ON3GO Posted May 28, 2004 Share Posted May 28, 2004 omg thank god i ever got into computers like i wanted to. my friend who is a computer nerd says things like "BRB" not Be Right Back but B R B! and even says LOL.. i wanna hit him. man i guess i can understand why your kinda off the wall then if you have to deal with those type of people each day. mike Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JMortensen Posted May 28, 2004 Share Posted May 28, 2004 Prairie Dogging has a distinctively different meaning to me, as in your buddy says "What's wrong with you?" and you say "Dude, I'm prairiedogging. I gotta find a bathroom." It often is associated with the "Coffee Attack", another one I don't see on your list. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tim240z Posted May 28, 2004 Share Posted May 28, 2004 Prairie Dogging has a distinctively different meaning to me, as in your buddy says "What's wrong with you?" and you say "Dude, I'm prairiedogging. I gotta find a bathroom." It often is associated with the "Coffee Attack", another one I don't see on your list. OMG Now that is funny!!!! How about "turtle head"? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JMortensen Posted May 28, 2004 Share Posted May 28, 2004 My brother in law says that one. Boy we sure turned this into potty humor quick, huh? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tim240z Posted May 28, 2004 Share Posted May 28, 2004 Boy we sure turned this into potty humor quick' date=' huh?[/quote'] Not surprising considering the topic starter...... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Chris240turbo Posted May 28, 2004 Share Posted May 28, 2004 Mike, you're SO 404!!! Bring on the beating, skinny guy!!! call me monday or tuesday, and we'll get "ole blue" sorted out, I got your message, but had to leave the state for a few days. "don't ask!" anyhow, give me a shout the 1st of next week... 8) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phantom Posted May 28, 2004 Share Posted May 28, 2004 Reminds me a bit of the Air Force Falcon Codes. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Owen Posted May 28, 2004 Share Posted May 28, 2004 This list is a big hit in our office. I added two to describe some of our own people. 26. Peacock - Someone who, when in a crowd, needs to show how much they know, etc. by talking so much and giving examples from their own life. Much like a peacock that opens it's tail feathers to be the center of attention. 27. Peacrock - Someone who tries to be a Peacock, but no one else is listening/paying attention. But I need help with these...any suggestions? Not necessarily acronyms either. ---- Here from overseas but with no purpose ---- Overpaid because he knows more (about PCs, etc.) than the people who hired him ---- Unprepared Unreliable Full of sh!t Nit-picks miniscule costs but can't see why the company is on the verge of bankruptcy The FLY Someone who flies in to any ongoing conversation and tries intently to become a part of it. Similar to how a fly homes in on crap laying in the grass. ---- Trendy company catch phrases that make something sound sophisticated even though not a damn thing has changed. Example, Associcates, Kick-Off, Going Forward, etc. PDCA A method used to solve a problem even though most People Don't Care Anyway Owen Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest ON3GO Posted May 28, 2004 Share Posted May 28, 2004 Unprepared Unreliable Full of sh!t Thats called a Tim240Z Bring it old man! hehe Mike Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Owen Posted May 28, 2004 Share Posted May 28, 2004 Oooh! Tim, you gonna let him call you that?! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tim240z Posted May 29, 2004 Share Posted May 29, 2004 Wait until he's sweating his @ss off in Rancho Cucamonga!! I go out there and :malebitchslap: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
auxilary Posted May 29, 2004 Author Share Posted May 29, 2004 yeah, this thread's definitely going down teh sh1tter..... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JMortensen Posted May 29, 2004 Share Posted May 29, 2004 What are you talking about Aux? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
z-REX Posted May 29, 2004 Share Posted May 29, 2004 ---- Here from overseas but with no purpose touron, of course! ---- Overpaid because he knows more (about PCs, etc.) than the people who hired him surrogate brain? Nit-picks miniscule costs but can't see why the company is on the verge of bankruptcy financial ANAList... Trendy company catch phrases that make something sound sophisticated even though not a damn thing has changed. Example' date=' Associcates, Kick-Off, Going Forward, etc.[/quote'] plopaganda??? hey... i work for corporate...figured i could help!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest ON3GO Posted May 29, 2004 Share Posted May 29, 2004 Wait until he's sweating his @ss off in Rancho Cucamonga!! I go out there and :malebitchslap: aw man you had me laughing hard there.. Mike Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tim240z Posted May 29, 2004 Share Posted May 29, 2004 Wait until he's sweating his @ss off in Rancho Cucamonga!! I go out there and :malebitchslap: aw man you had me laughing hard there.. Mike You won't be for long!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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