SO what did YOU accomplish???

[Mikelly]

A number of factors, A really bad premonition, a couple of losses in the extended family, and a pint of Gentleman's jack, and I'm sittin' here thinking...

 

You guys know about my latest trials and tribulations, and I'm sure by now I'm sounding like the whiney bitch... Maybe I am... Been a bad two months.

 

So my cousin died this week of Liver Cancer. She left three teenagers behind, and she was a lovely woman. When I was a young boy of 12-15, I used to carry Regina's pic around and brag about my cousin. She was a looker with a heart as big as Michigan. Last year at our family reunion Regina went head to head with the "other team" while we did the ussual and beat up on them in volley ball. My aunt Virgie (Regina's mom) knew she was sick, but didn't let on. I'm still amazed she kept it together. Guess my father and his syblings are from strong stock.

 

If you are bored by now, you might want to bail on this thread, as it is gonna be a long one... My therapy... Tough Zhit. (thanks Superdan.)

 

SO all this latest death, stress, and kid "Stuff" got me thinking... What have you accomplished? I mean really accompished??? If your number is called tomorrow and you are yanked out of your shoes, what can you stand before your maker and be proud of? Can you?

 

If you die tomorrow, is there someone who is gonna stand up and speak the truth about the wonderful guy or gal you had been in life? Is there someone who will be moved to speak about the "real" you and be able to depict you in death as you were in life? This isn't a religious thread, but maybe one of Karma? The point is you have one shot at life, and 80 years go by like waiting in a Dr's office, so Jr. Don't blow it, and PAY Attention.

 

I was 17 years old when I graduated highschool. My father was LOWER (way lower) middle class and we lived on government cheese and foodstamps. It wasn't corvettes and 125K per year gov't contracts back then. I was happy to have a home and a roof...parents that loved me. Looking back, I'm simply speechless at the way life has turned out for me... Strong stock indeed. But yesterday I got into a conversation with one of my best friends and it turned into "what if... " and who I'd want to speak on my behalf if mr. grim came knocking... WHAT have I accomplished besides pissing off the wife and stepsons lately? Well that can be a tough question to ask yourself, and to give a fair answer! Well??... But lets face it... Life knows no schedule and death does not coordinate with day planners.

 

So where am I going here? Those who haven't ejected by now, hang tight. There is a point, and no, it isn't on my head...

 

We push to develop the most impressive cars on the planet, and we have the collective wisdom here and now... Don't bogg down in the most technical of details and drag this project HybridZ out longer than you can justify at the end of the day... It's a car. We're not curing cancer here (although, right now my family, extended family and others wish it were that simple!)!!! The object is to build, drive, and enjoy the ride. Can you do that? Will anyone know if you didn't get coil overs, or big brakes on it for the trip back and forth during the daily grind? Build, drive and enjoy for YOUR car for YOUR application... After all, you are who you should be building for!

 

So, I'm sitting here thining about this life, this life that Dan Porter and Owen have for ever changed for me personally, and I know that in that last breath, that last instance life is here within me, Some how this site, you people, will be in my mind... Crazy as it sounds, along with my family, wife, son, step kids, all the friends along the way... You will be with me... but what will I have accomplished, that I can speak of, of course... So what have you accomplished?

 

Just think about it...

 

Clock is ticking!

Mike

[CruxGNZ]

You know, I have been through quite a bit while I've been at this site, almost died a couple times... but the only thing that kept me going (as crazy as this may seem) was the thought of getting my Z on the road under it's own power and just be damn proud of what I had built. I haven't even thought about what to do after it's running and the body is finished. And now, you have me thinking maybe I should just sell the car when I have come so far and when it's almost complete then use the money as a down payment for a house and get my life going... maybe my car was just there for me to keep me head up? Hmmm...

 

!M!

[Mikelly]

You don't get off that easy Mat! Try again!

Good reach though!

 

Mike

[CruxGNZ]

 

!M!

[mark]

Most of what I do is for my family. They love me for it and appreciate what I do for them. That keeps me going and makes me think I'm on the right track. Stuff doesn't matter when the Doc looks at you and says that your first born may die. He's fine now, but that brings a clairty of perspective that nothing else can touch.

 

Mark

[Tim240z]

you will always regret the things that you don't do, not the things that have done......

[Guest ON3GO]

Mike 1st off im very sorry to hear that news on your family, im sure she was a great woman and i wish you and her family the best during these hard times and the future.

 

although im way young, much younger then most of you guys on here, and compared to old man river Tim (haha i love giving you a hard time Tim) i prob shouldnt even be chiming in on this thread, as i really havent done much.

 

i will say at the age of 21 i feel and sorta act like a older man. Although sometimes like last night with Chris on this site, i felt like i was 8 years old again, with me and him beating the living crap out of my Scion xB, hahaha that was a blast!

I for one dont do drugs, i have tried some but its not my thing, i do drink, but not like the reg ole 21 or younger man does. i will not drink and drive, i wont put myself or others in that path. And most of all i respect everybody, even the people i dont care for.

Now i have gone through alot of hard times in my short life, with my father being on the verge of death, mother having more stress put upon here then jesus himself wouldnt want, and ive delt with death all around me from as long as i can look back.

The day i can say i did something worth even talking about was the day i sorta saved my fathers life. he went into a sezure and me being the 130lb guy i am PICKED my dad up at the weight of 230 or so lbs of dead weight.. i did it without even blinking.

i didnt panic, i just did what was needed and called 911. i then helped the medics with there job and took care of what was needed at the hospital as my mom was at work and unawear at what happened. at that point when my mother was in tears and everybody else, i felt like my father.. taking control and doing what needed to be done.

Now i was never so close with my dad, and when he said "why dont you build a old Z" i didnt even say NO.. i bought one (green Z) without sitting in it, or even ever sitting in or driving a old Z in the 1st place.

now when we started building it we did have our momments, much like you and your stepsons Mike.. but my dad being how he is, and me being just like him.. we never let up and just went off on each other.

when i moved to Houston for school and i couldnt work on it anymore with him, i felt the most alone and sad then.. it ment alot just waking up and going in the garage and having a bonding momment with my dad. He might not know how that ment to me but one say i hope to tell him.

When i moved here to Houston i also left the girl i loved and still love.. she has more problems then i can even list, its sooo sad as she is a beautiful girl and i would sell my soul for her.. but i know ill never get the chance to be with her.

she is beyond gone.. she now things she is a lesbo and does drugs and etc.. all because she cant accept that ppl really do love her for what she is.

 

now, as of where i am now and what im doing here in houston im very proud of myself.

i became somebody that most ppl in the import scene know about, just because of my blue Z i built. i made it into nothing into something with help from Z members here in houston that will forever be FAMILY in my heart! Chris and Ed i love to death!

chris has opened his life and familys life to me, and ill never forget that for as long as i live.

ed.. well he is like a brother to me, which i hope stays near me where ever i go.

Im also proud that im working and doing the things i love, and having fun at the same time. I mean who else at the age of 21 has driven and seen and done some of the things i have done with cars.. its awesome! i love Ferraris!! lol.

 

still i must say i have alot more ahead of me, i need to learn so much more in how cars work and how life works... everyday i take a tip on how to live my life from you guys, most of you guys are like big brothers to me and that means alot to skinny ole mike.

where ever i go and live in the next few months will be hard times but im sure ill get through just fine.

 

one day i hope to be like most of you guys on here, with a family of my own, a job i love, cars and money flowing in, and in good health.

 

Mike

[Here comes trouble]

I am just pleased that I survived this long and still in one piece.

[hanomon]

I don't know that our lives are measured so much by what we achieve, but rather by who we have afected positively. Not by what we acomplish but by who's lives we have touched.

 

Mr Kelly, I have yet to meet you personally however, let me say that you sir, have moved me with your depth and insight.

 

Way beyond all of our automotive intrists lies a much greater call we all must answer or ignore. Reaping the rewards or feeling the emptiness of not responding.

 

We know in the deepest corners of our being what is good, right and true, however, while we learn to breathe, we have all sadly learned how not to listen to that which calls us twoards being much, much more.

 

Yeh, it's just a car I'm building but then again, I'm just passin' through.

 

As for what I have done? IMO diddly.

 

Perhaps after I'm gone, my family may have a different answer to this thought provoking question.

 

Mahalo/Thank you for asking.

Warmest Aloha to you my friend!

Hano

[wheelman]

Boy Mike you sure know how to ask the tough questions but as you say this is one we all should ask ourselves from time to time.

 

The things I'm proudest of are my children. I have a son who is 18 and just graduating from Highschool and Jr. college with an AA at the same time. He is following in my footsteps and has enlisted in the Airforce and leaves for basic next month. I'm very proud of him. We don't always see eye to eye nad he will stand his ground to me if he feels he's right and still listen to my side of the argument, what more can I ask for. My daughter is 15 and turning into a beautiful young lady that also will listen to what I have to say and consider it before making a decision. I'm very proud of her and know that whatever guy she ends up with will be a very lucky guy.

Along with my children I consider my marriage to the same woman, who I love very much, of 19 years to be my accomplishments. I haven't cured cancer or made any earth changing discoveries but I think building a quality life with my wife and sending two mature individuals into the world equiped to handle it is something to be proud of.

 

I went through a period similar to yours at about the same age as you are and I have to say working through it and asking yourself these types of questions makes you a better person when you come out the other side. I lost my father and a brother within a 3 year period, my older sister found out she had breast cancer and I found out I'm diabetic and have some issues with my heart, all this combined with some real ugly things going on where I worked made that 3 years the worst of my life. I look back on that time and realize just how good things are right now. Going through all that is what prompted me to build the Z, it was something I had wanted to do for a long time and who knows how long we have. It is strange though what becomes a priority in times like that, what kept me going was a very strong desire to see my kids grow up and have children of their own.

OK enough sappy stuff!!!

 

Wheelman

[datsunlover]

Well.. What have I done? Not alot I guess.. I'm only 26. BUT, if I were to die tomorow, I would regret nothing. If I were asked this question 5 years ago, it would have been a different answer.. I had a good childhood, not rich, but not a poor family. Life was great.. till I was 14. (This is about to get longwinded..) Then suddenly, my father died of a heart attack at 39. (3 days before his 40th.. his friends still had a get together in his honor.. it's how he would have wanted it) But this was a huge thing for me... Huh? He worked out.. ate healthy, didn't smoke, ect. Pop. Just like that. Stress I supose.. and heart problems run in the family. So here's my mother, me, and my younger brother left behind... It was kind of like that first drop off a rollercoaster.. but not so fun. The next 5 years were pretty rough, but we caried on. Got to the point I could talk about it with people, begin to understand it.. you know. In high school, one of my close friends lost his father in a similar way, so it kind of got dredged up again.. His mother looked to me to help him through it.. THAT was odd.. In a way though, it helped ME too..

 

So after I turned 19, I was doing pretty good.. had finished high school, had a job, had dreams and big plans. Another friend of mine looses HER father.. she's a little better equiped for it, being 31 and all, but it's never "OK" at any age.. I tried my best to help her too.. Although, the BEST thing a close friend can do it simply listen.. and DON'T say. "It'll be ok." It's never ok, and it never will be. You just get better at dealing with that fact. One day that summer my mother calls me at work (gas station) says there's been an accident, and my aunt is in the hospital up north. This is my fathers sister, who had 3 boys.. awsome woman.. Seams she was a pssenger in a car that pulled off the side of the road (driver didn't check over her shoulder) and.. well, got run over my an 18 wheeler. Her friend (driver) died instantly, my aunt ended up in a coma. I made the 3 hour trip up after work that day.. my mom was already there, but it was too much for my brother to handle right then. Heck, I only stayed for a night with my mom, and drove back.. Too much you know? After 2 weeks, they pulled the plugs at my uncle's wishes. She was a nurse, and would never want to 'live' that way ..indefinatly on machines. The funeral was like dejv-vu twilight zone style... Oh, She was 38. Wow.. maybe my family is cursed?

 

Last month I get another call.. My 76 years young Oma (grandmother, my fathers side) is in the hospital.. heart attack. Fortunatly, her pacemaker and the quick responce from 911 kept her alive. My mother, brother and I drove up 3 huors to see her, and she's doing ok.. but with her age, the medication she's on, and given the fact she's already lost her husband, son, and daughter, she knows her days are numbered. I'm preparing...

 

I probly shouldn't think about it as much at my age, but I've seen a lot of.. death. The trick is to not get depresed about these things, but to realize that life can be short.. and you should LIVE it, not fear it. I've realilzed recently that almost evrything I do is, at least in part, based on what people would think of me.. People like my father, my aunt, ect. I always expect I'll see them again someday.. I hope I've done well so far...

[Mikelly]

Good words to live By TIM!

 

Good comments guys, this was more to spur discussion than to have the spotlight on me... I like the discussions and the "self-reflections" being shared...

 

Mike

[BillZ260]

I guess I am a work in progress! As is everything I do. I am not the best at anything, but I try and do alot of different activities which keep me going and distracted at the same time. +'s and -'s... I TRY to be a good guy, fun, laid back whatever, but have found for some reason, the older I get the less of these I am. Not really sure how to fix that but I need to get on it, I'm not yet 30 and I don't want to be an old grouch. But I do enjoy life, try to not take much too seriously, have good relationships and I am reading more! Going back to school next semester for my Masters, (another distraction?) and all in all try to learn as much as I can about everything that pops up in life.

 

Life ain't perfect, gotta roll w/ the Zhit and keep your head up. (Last HOLIDAY weekend I had to board my dad's place up because their was 4-5 people living there, my childhood home, talk about a bummer) Figure out a way to deal with each situation that arises an keep on TRUCKING!

 

Love you guy's, this is my Rock, I come here just about everyday and try to keep tabs on all the activity going on and learn from your triumphs and... well what I like to call "learning activities". Keep it up and I can only hope to meet some of you in the future, hopefully by that time, I won't kringe too much when I say "beers on me"

[Guest Battle Pope]

I can honestly say that for all intents and purposes, I haven't really etched my name into anyone's life in a way that would be lasting. Of course, this coming from a young man of only 19 years.

 

I've done a few things, but only to satisfy my wanton desire for the finer things in life. I've built an import showcar, been in a solid relationship for 3 years (not an easy task at my age), held my job for 2 years now, and recently started a wild HybridZ project.

 

However, still being a mere "teenager", I don't usually garner much respect - no matter how I try to do things the right way and be respectful of others. Hopefully in time, I will start being shown the consideration I like to think I have earned, if nothing else than for making it almost 20 without making any life-threatening errors in judgment.

[Michael]

Most things that we do, we do because we’re told to, or because we feel compelled to.

 

Most things that we do for amusement and recreation are silly and soon forgotten. Unless they get us into trouble.

 

Accomplishments? Like what? Cars rust, houses rot, fortunes crumble, muscles turn to flab.

 

One thing that’s starting to become clear for me – and this Z project is contributing to the clarity – is that goals can be grouped into two halfs: those that can’t be achieved, and those that aren’t worth achieving.