So let me tell you the difference between volunteer and draft

[auxilary]

I work for a credit union. The company is run by "yes" people reporting a tard who thinks he is a charismatic leader that likes to deliver long boring monotonous monologues that put people to sleep. The company is trying everything to boost morale and missing the obvious point off "pay people money and they will be happier"

 

Long story short, they decided to to an activity day for Columbus Day. The CU is closed anyway, so they had everyone gather up, gave a briefing about team work, etc etc... and then sprung the surprise on everyone.

 

"Hey everyone! We're going to help out Katrina victims by doing volunteer work!"

 

translation: we got split up into groups and shuttled off to THRIFT STORES to do volunteer work. Last time I checked, volunteering meant *I* wanted to do something to help out, and the word "Draft" followed by "communism" more closely matches the situation.

 

Let's see... First place I got taken to, already pissed off, mind you, was Shepherd's Gate thrift store. Now, herein lie the problems:

 

a. it's associated with organized religion. I told the manager with my group that for my personal reasons, I'm not helping out.

 

b. it's a ******* thrift store. I don't see how volunteering at a thrift store in california helps katrina victims. last I checked, clothes are BOUGHT at thrift stores, not donated. That's what goodwill and salvation army are for. As I found out, thrift stores are commonly used to do community service hours assigned by courts as punishments

 

So I was transferred to another shithole, and I should probably stayed at the first location. The location I arrived at... well, let's see, it was run by a woman missing most of her teeth and had a speech impediment that make Elmer Fudd seem intelligent. The store smelled like cat piss and rat ****, and there was a dead rat in a corner in one room. Our assignment was to basically "feng shui" crap.

 

Yes, ladies and gents, I reiterate that this is a PAID WORK DAY for me. Naturally, I avoided work when I could. Not because I'm squeamish, but because I was "volunteered" to do something I do not believe in. Somehow, the upper management believed this is going to "boost morale" and "improve teamwork!" The assignment was for everyone to learn one positive thing about someone else in their group. I think the unison answer will be "everyone hated this ****"

 

Halfway through I've had it, and called my VP, telling him to call me back. I wanted to tell him that I've had it, I quit, and I need a pick up to be taken back to my car. Right after I left the voicemail (which he never returns, because he's a chickenshit afraid of confrontations), our group went to eat lunch in a local park. A crappy sandwich, bland tasteless "gourmet" potato salad, and a soda. Way to piss me off more. I separated from the rest of the group, and laid in the grass to relax.

 

That didn't last long, we went back in. I did my best to act as a union worker, and avoided labor at all costs, or did a shoddy job of it. Why? because I didn't care. Someone in my group said "well, look at it this way, you're getting paid to do this job a LOT more than people who work here!" To which I promptly replied with "Yeah, but I don't give a rat's *** because it wasn't my choice to be here, and I need a ride back so I can say "screw you" and quit."

 

Then came moment of redemption. The toothless hick came up to me and said "do you want to break down furniture with a sledge hammer? most guys like to do it to get aggression out"

 

My eyes lit up with newfound hope. I was handed a 3 foot long 5 lb axe, which I promptly unleashed onto whatever crap needed to be cut up, broken down, etc. With a lot of anger. Lots and lots of anger. It was rather funny to hear the HR director say "I learned that the only time I saw Alex happy was when he was wielding a huge axe, and that worries me."

 

At some point earlier the woman who ran the crap, er.. thrift store asked me to move 2 ugly pieces of furniture that just arrived. Lost in her wording, I asked "which 2 ugly pieces?" because frankly... I couldn't tell. It was the equivalent of standing in a valet parking lot of Suzuki X90s, Pontiac Azteks, Gremlins, and Arrows and having someone say "can you move the ugly car over there?"

 

I let loose throughout the day. I wouldn't be surprised if I get canned today or later, because frankly, it was an incredibly stupid decision. If I don't get fired, they need to fire the idiot who thought this was a good idea.

 

However, I did learn something else... I learned how two-faced people really are (well, I knew, but this basically showed it completely in the open). Someone working with me was bitching and complaing as much as I have. In the van, being shuttled back, a higher up asked "so, what did you learn, what could be improved?" followed by the same person responding in a completely opposite tone, voicing improvements on the existing hated situation! The answer was "how about NOT doing this. EVER" but it was something along the lines of "oh yeah, maybe we could get a team of volunteers to do this every month!"

 

Pathetic gutless sacks of **** that work here. All of them. Spineless jellyfish who will never ever amount to anything in their lives. People who have 0 ambition to do anything, and have spent 20 years of their lives working the same mundane pointless job, bitch and moan about it, and complain.

 

Why didn't I walk out? I have an opportunity to finish learning some systems that I otherwise would not get to have full control over. As soon as I finish, I'm gone. In fact, back to job search! So yeah, I hope my experience taught you all a lesson

[Gollum]

Almost sounds as bad as being a teacher

 

Tearing up furniture with an axe sounds awsome though. The work situations sure sounds like it sucks. I hope you find a better job man.

[JMortensen]

I feel for you Alex. The worst for me was at one of my very first jobs. I was young and seriously underpaid. Anyway, they did the Secret Santa thing there, and I pulled the VP's name. So now I have to buy this bitch a present. This was the same VP who had told me just a few weeks earlier "You make good money for someone your age" when I pointed out that the middle aged woman who had my job previously made $5/hr more than I was making. Discriminate on the basis of age much? Then all the other worker drones wanted to show this drunkard what a great boss she was, so they all chipped in to buy her a present. Of course I was sucked into that one as well, so now I'm buying 2 presents for her. As it turns out I spent more money on her that year then I did on my girlfriend. That REALLY pissed me off. Needless to say I don't do well with the compulsory gift giving or forced generosity either.

[auxilary]

I think I'm going to **** in the suggestion box later today

[johnc]

Man, be grateful! I worked at a company who's boss was a cycling nut. Out of the blue one morning he called everyone into the office and said that today is a "team building" day and we were all going on a 15 mile bike ride around the Back Bay in Newport. He even arranged for a bicycle rental company to supply all of us with bikes and they were waiting for us out front.

 

I just left and went home.

 

The next day 2/3 of the company called in sick or injured and those that did show up had sore asses. No one mentioned my leaving and, in fact, no one talked about that day ever again.

[JMortensen]

That's pretty lame John. On the bright side, I guess you can be glad he wasn't into bull riding...

[b__sosick]

I think I'm going to **** in the suggestion box later today

 

I'll paypal you a dollar right now if you do.

[Pop N Wood]

Just start bringing the axe into work.

[auxilary]

dude, couple of people freaked out when I took out my pocket knife to open up some boxes.

 

My reply was "well, I carry it with me when I'm not at work. Since we're not at the office, it goes with me"

[b__sosick]

HAHA.

I carry a small utility blade with me all the time especially at work, because i'm constantly having to have something to cut ropes and crap.

 

 

and people freak out all the time when they see it.

 

I'm not exactly intimidating. I'm 5' 7" and 150 lbs soaking wet. *sigh*

[auxilary]

I forgot to mention that a lot of women were upset because this was sprung on us as a surprise, and well... you know women. expensive clothes, heels, etc + rat crap and cat urine don't mix

[innerware]

I'll paypall you 20 bucks if you **** in the box and take a picture for me.

[Mikelly]

I'm still laughing at the image of John C. on a bicycle...

 

I biked 27 miles sunday in the wind and dark clouds... I call it therapy!

 

Mike

[b__sosick]

I'm still laughing at the image of John C. on a bicycle...

 

I biked 27 miles sunday in the wind and dark clouds... I call it therapy!

 

Mike

 

sweet! I rode a good 15-20 miles yesterday at the trails over here at a place called hannah park' date=' and took a route that ended up with me on the beach for a mile or two. :']

[dr_hunt]

Maybe it wasn't a bike ride john, I mean sore asses and all, well, it looks kind of funny doesn't it? Maybe it was a ruse and the rest of the group doesn't want to talk about it anymore cause they had to take it bent over. I know bosses like that.

 

Peter, guy at a place I used to work, kinda weird, knew him in college at NMIMT. He and I were talking one day in the hall and our bitch woman boss came walking down the hall and instead of going around us, made us move and went inbetween us while he was talking about a project to me and was in mid sentence. She interrupted him and said "When your finished BS-ing come see me". She walked down the hall and Peter said "Hey Biitch, the next time you cut me off like that I'll kill you!"

 

She hauled buns to her office and locked the door, called her boss, he went the other way and filed a harrassment claim with HR. Needless to say, she had to apologize in front of everyone and he got away with it, while the whole company swore he was going to go postal any day.

 

Same corporate crap, different day. If you **** in the box, can prove that they got the present with pic's, I'll paypal you $20 also. Of course, I'd get another job first.

[Pop N Wood]

dude' date=' couple of people freaked out when I took out my pocket knife to open up some boxes.

 

My reply was "well, I carry it with me when I'm not at work. Since we're not at the office, it goes with me"[/quote']

 

 

Well just tell them they are the ones who expanded your job description to include wielding an axe. Tell them you want to have it handy in case anyone forces you to volunteer again.

[Gollum]

I've carried a minimum of a 3 inch retractible blade since I was 12. It's a tool, not a weapon. Amazing how many people don't see it that way.

[auxilary]

had a nice chat with HR. they were concerned about me being pissed off (i wonder why!)

 

I voiced my opinion, I was blunt, and frankly, when I was told to talk to HR in an hour, I cleaned out my cell phone and my PC. I told them why it was a draft rather than a volunteer job, and that next time they need to ask people and get a poll. I told them I could've done a whole lot more for the company instead of moving ****-covered furniture to a dumpster.

 

No write up, still have a job. Of course, this didn't really put a positive aspect on my job security, so I'm sure I'm under the microscope now

[Gollum]

The only problem is that the managment at your job has a microscopic view of a telescopic realm. They're in a whole nother world man, and it certainly ain't reality.

[Z-TARD]

Sounds like most days in the Navy, except we can't get fired for having an attitude, and we can't quit either. My only question is how do you plan on grunting out an entire meal through the little slot in the suggestion box? I'm lactose intolerant, so when I eat ice cream the end result is that I can shat through a keyhole at 50 paces. My advice is to find the foodgroup that accomplishes this for you and give that little box hell. Put me down for a $20 Paypal donation as well upon mission completion.

 

Mike