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Lost Nukes????


stony

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Ok here is the story... we all heard about the lost nukes flying around the US. Well in an attempt to account for all stuff that should be controlled there was a email sent out here at HILL that stated we were all to scour our respective work areas for stuff that just shouldn't be there. Mostly applied to supply and the AMMO dump. i got the email read it and pressed.

 

Then about an hour later these guys walked into my office. With a ruler, aluminum foil and a paperclip. I politley asked WTF are you doing??? He looked at me the straightest face in the world and said. "SIR I'm looking for radioactive material, here's the email sir it's for real" I said WOW this is serious. You better get back to work. then i proceeded to get out my Iphone and capture the moment. At this point teh SrA, and 2 A1C had been walking around all the AMU offices checking everywhere.

 

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The guy reading the paper... at this point said, after i gathered them up to take a picture, "guys i dont think this is legit" we all laughed and left. They then proceeded to the commanders office..... end of story. the fun we have working 12 hour shifts on Sunday

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"Dighera I need you to go down and bring me back 12 yards of Flightline from the Fab Shop"

 

Nonchalantly went to the tool crib and checked out some large chains and the keys to one of the AGE Tugs. TSGT that sent me on the trip was looking quizzically at me from some distance as I hear my supervisor go ask him why I was getting chain...

 

"I don't know, I sent him to the fab shop to get 12 yards of flightline (chortle chortle)"

 

My supervisor FREAKS raspy wispers in a panic: "Man you don't screw with Dighera man, dat muffu**a's crazy, he's gonna go hook those damn chains up AND REALLY BRING YOU BACK SOME DAMN FLIGHT LINE!"

 

Then they all tried to dissuade me for some time from going and tearing up the tarmac because I was ordered to do so...

 

These guys with the detection device are the guys that go to the Avionics Shop to pick up an A-S-H Receiver, or spend time trying to activate the Kick Start or Voice Command NF2 Light Cart... the same guys who went hook and sinker for the Nuke Plugs in Packette Engines... Oh, the list goes on...

 

Airman, Stand Down.

 

Nothing has changed in 25 years...

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We had a couple pretty cool ones. My favorites where sending Airmen over to the SP's to get some K9P, having Airmen collect "air samples" from the dry bays on C-130's. We had one kid take samples from every dry bay (5 of 'em in a 130) every hour for eight hours, write the time, date and bay on the bag, then put them in a box with his info on it on the Captains desk for the morning meting. The Captain was thrilled with the box of empty baggies. The best was "echo checks" on the engines. I think you can find a video of this on youtube. Good times!

 

BTW: If a Sra was actually doing this, and not in on it he's a goober...you should know better by then.

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BTW: If a Sra was actually doing this, and not in on it he's a goober...you should know better by then.

 

 

This is why i took pictures. All three were honestly working there asses off trying to find the stuff. If i told this story with no pics it would be unbelievable. if it could be any more then it is. :icon56:

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BTW: If a Sra was actually doing this, and not in on it he's a goober...you should know better by then.

 

I do not have the confidence in the WAPS that would have me making that same statement!:mrgreen:

 

As a SrA I got E-5's on the Nuke Spark Plugs thing since I was relatively 'fresh out of tech school' I convinced them it was real. Somewhere on this site, there is a reference to the same scam... It can still fly today! When I tested for E5, the E-4 Buck Sgt that was my 'supervisor' at the time scored 37 SKT, 48 PFE...

 

I was 98SKT, 98PFE, and the questions I missed I changed... But he was my 'supervisor'... I got him on a lot of stuff as well. It was always fun to use the T.O.'s like weapons. Especially when you can quote them by number section, and page as to why you're doing something. They always left you alone to go 'check it out' and usually left you alone the rest of the day trying to figure out 'how does he know that?' Er, maybe because I can read?

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Yup, prop wash as well. I was the last group to have to "earn" E-5, before the great Staff give away. Came is as an AB also, so had to earn them all. Got sick of working for idiots that diddn't know the first thing about the engine, so here I am on the outside...working for more idiots who don't know a thing about airplanes.

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I have been always mech inclined and heard most of the jokes. One of my supervisors tried to get me on the flight control cable stretcher when i was a youngin. i told him he was full of crap BUT he insisted i go get it from a place i knew didn't have it. one reason is i know they didn't have it and the other was i knew he was full of crap. So i obeyed and left on my quest. I went to Burger king and got a whopper then over to the BX and picked up a few new CD's. When i got back he asked if i got it. I said no and he laughed as if he had just pulled off this major prank. Then he said i could go to lunch... i said no thanks i already ate. then he asked what are you gonna do for lunch then. i said listen to my new CD'S!!!!!

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Yeah....

 

"Dighera, I always new there was something about you..."

TSgt Smith, 18EMS Orderly Room

 

There was an E5 Giveaway? I was one of two who made the cut out of 400 in PACAF. At that point, I was redlined for 'quality force' reasons. I guess being competent and meeting all fitness requirements other than being 'overweight' (with <7% BodyFat via Immersion Nomogram) was enough to disqualify you for service in 1989.

 

My Shop Chief was livid 'Oh, we're going to fight this!'

 

Chief, the only reason you give a crap about me is because you want to go to AWACS AGE and brag your troop was one of two in PACAF to make the Staff Cut in the career field (and I was #1, blew away the cut on first testing cycle I was eligible with minimum time in grade, and APR's that went 9,9,7,9... Not a great thing for WAPS) Some times I have to laugh at the rules they made back then.

 

I hear it's worse now for some things. Nothing like entrenching bureaucrats bent on standards of inanity unparallelled in most Civilian Circles.

 

It's not 'only in the Air Force'---it's more like "Only in the Gubbmint" it's like a disease!

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Yah Tony, I would say 03-04 is when it started. I joined in 98 and made Staff my second time testing. I was the #1 non-selected in my career field first time (missed it by less then a point) the crappy thing was my WAPS scores where higher then some that made it, but I had just enough TIS to test, so that score was pretty low. I made it my second time by a land slide. The problem was right around the time I joined was when the AF figured out that they had cut too many people, so they started recruiting like crazy, then all the mid-level that never wanted any more then SSGT or TSGT started retiring, so they where running thin on mid-level managers so they needed to promote allot to re-build the middle tier...thus the great Staff give away. They scores you needed to make it where ridiculous. I had a couple friends not study and walk in there first time and make it.

 

My biggest reason for getting out was that it seemed to me that the people we had in my AFSC in charge where the worst to have in those positions, the only reason they where there was because they had hung around the longest. We had a TSgt (who made MSgt and is now receiving a retirement somewhere) who was our shop super who could not work on aircraft without a supervisor (me..E5, and he WAS my reporting official). The one time I let him work by himself it was to change a syncrophaser...there's only one per aircraft, its a big electronic box that can only go in one way, what could go wrong? Well, he did it while I went to HIS meeting, then he came and got me to run the airplane because he was not qualified to run it. So we head out and he starts heading to the wrong row of planes and I say "hey, we are over here" and he shrugs and follows me to the nose. I grab the forms to look over his work and sign it off and he says "I think I messed up" uh...how? "I changed the sync on a different plane". Oh SH%$...that plane is flying in 10 min, and needs a power run...great. So I run it, it checks good but the Captain wants an answer NOW... and he look at me to go in and take the heat... FU BUDDY...GET IN THERE AND MAN UP! I have a ton more about this JA... Remember that when you pay your taxes...

 

Sorry to jack the thread... call it post traumatic stress syndrome or something...

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